Life Lessons

Being an older sibling to Parker, I always thought I was the one to be the teacher, the example and someone for him to look up to. Through losing him, I realize that a lot of the time it was the complete opposite. He taught me so many things in his 22 years. Although addiction brings many ups and down, he still leaves behind so many amazing things. Here are just a few things he taught me:

To always make others smile. He was such a clown ALL. THE. TIME. Whether it was at home with our family or at school, he was constantly making everyone around him smile and laugh. Always, always smile at strangers.

Confidence. I grew up being bullied for my weight. Even when I grew into my curves in high school I still viewed myself as “fat”. He always made sure everyday to tell me I looked great. He was so conceded, so confident. He would light up a room with his charm. It taught me to love myself, no matter what size or shape or size I am.

Never settle for less. Being the only girl there was a lot of men in my household my dates had to go through. He was so protective when my older two brothers moved out. He was the first to put an ex in a choke hold for calling me names one day in the driveway. He bought me flowers my first Mother’s Day after my ex didn’t say or do anything for me. He wrote me a sweet card telling me I was a great mom. He showed me through such love and respect exactly how I should be treated. He was the first to give his approval of my husband to date Kohen and I, knowing we would be loved and respected for eternity.

Sing like no one’s listening, dance like no one’s watching. We had some great concerts in our household and in the car. We would grab the nearest object turning it into a microphone. We even used tiki torches in the front porch one day. That kid could sing. girl parts, guys parts and all the parts in between. He would dance like a stripper on the doorways. He could shimmy with the best of them. He didn’t care who saw or what anyone had to say. His confidence was always beaming in everything he did.

To love like tomorrow never comes. Everyday on my families shoulders through his addiction was fear. Fear that we would get that dreaded phone call. That taught us all to love and love hard. My favorite quote stems from him, “If love could’ve saved you, you would’ve lived forever”. And how true those words are, even through the “tough love”. We call it tough love because we still loved him so unconditionally, there were just boundaries involved. We all loved every single cherished millisecond we got to spend with him, even if he was high. Life has so completely changed and in his death, I love even harder than before. My hubby, my babies, my family. Never take a day with your loved ones for granted, you never know what tomorrow brings.

#PJKAllDay #DontStopBelieving